Thursday, December 11, 2003

Thursday, December 11, 2003

I went mini-shopping last night.  Hehe, if I use that term instead it is almost bearable.  I really seem to have a 70 minute time limit though.  No matter where I am or how much fun it is, I get really antsy and ready to leave then.  I was at a bookstore (and we all know how much I adore books), but then suddenly I couldn't finish up fast enough.

So wouldn't you know I ran into someone from my past in the check-out line.  Thankfully it wasn't anyone I dated, but it was still weird and awkward.  Let's catch up 10 years time in 2.5 minutes in full hearing of those around us.  It felt as if we were tallying up our scores in life since the moment we last saw each other.  She admitted to having a hard time with addiction.  What does one say to that?  "Oh sorry to hear that.  I have a fabulous life with the man I love, and I mostly enjoy my job."   That seems wrong.  So I downplayed.  "I'm okay." 

Gone was the vivacious giggling girl I had known and in her place was a serious woman with pain in her eyes.  She gave me her card and asked me to call her for coffee since she doesn't drink.  Is it wrong to point out that caffeine is an addictive substance?  :p   I'm still debating on calling her or not.  How come she doesn't have email like a normal person?  ;)  I'm not ready to be her crutch.  Yeah I know she hasn't asked, but I see the potential and it frightens me.  And what kind of callous person does that make me that I don't want to help someone in need? 

See why I loathe shopping?  All I wanted were a few fucking books, and now I'm soul searching and feeling uncaring.

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