Saturday, June 14, 2003

Saturday, June 14, 2003

My lovely Galahad came home last night from his martial arts class and asked how I was and if I'd been crying.  Laugh, that of course broke the dam, and my tears started.  Poor guy.  ;)  He helped me to analyze things and think things through.  I'm trying a chemistry experiment with my CoQ10.  I am theorizing that if it helps with my migraines, then it must be affecting my serotonin levels, which in turn should help to normalize my moods.  Sound like a plan?  And, if it doesn't technically work, maybe I can ride the placebo rainbow.  Do placebos work if you are hoping they will?  Can I self-fulfill my prophecy?  Is my Psych degree going to help or hinder me here?

Cat's out of the bag.  I'm a geek with a Psych degree and an overactive mind.  =p  My guy wasn't quite sure what to make of my experiment, but I think he's just happy that I'm trying something.  I'm so stubborn that I refuse to let this take over my life.  Enough is fucking enough.  I'm tired of being like this.   My mother has been dead long enough for me to deal with it, so I cannot understand why it might still be bothering me.  I still don't think it's her death that is actually messing me up, but I suppose everyone in denial says that.  =p  Odd that I can retain my sense of humor while still being sad.  I laugh & cry simultaneously all the time.  I've only noticed a few other people who do that.  Does that have to do with multi-tasking?  Maybe cuz I'm so good at it, I can multi-task my emotions, too.  =D

/wave to my monkey friend  ;)

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