Tuesday, August 16, 2016
past my expiry date
When I was younger, I had a troubled youth and therefore assumed I'd be lucky to live until 30. Especially because so many of my contemporaries were dying before age 20. I'm well past both of those ages now, and I believe I have surpassed my freshness date. Things are breaking left and right. I feel like I'm held together by duct tape and willpower. Actually, I wish something as strong as duct tape was holding me together.
The migraines are as bad as they've ever been, before getting on CGRP, my clinical trial meds. In the last four weeks, I've had 13 migraines, with an average duration of over nine hours. Add in pre- and post-drome times, and that's my fucking life. In writing this post I looked at where I was last year, and apparently it wasn't great then either. So maybe I just don't do well this time of year. Whatever I have to tell myself to stay in denial.
On a cheerier note, my Vanda orchid is starting to bloom in direct line of sight from my office window.