Wednesday, January 6, 2016

never leave pufferfish hair as is


Yesterday, I woke up with my hair looking like an angry pufferfish.  I foolishly assumed I would be fine in my own home because Kitten didn't seem particularly scared.

And then my neighbor fell.  I ran next door as the paramedics were arriving.  The CUTE paramedics.  Sigh.  Is that a job requirement now?  My neighbor (shall I call her Totoro after the movie?) never ate the previous night when she got home from the hospital because she was too tired.  And she was in the middle of making breakfast when she lost her balance and fell, probably due to low blood sugar.  They checked her vitals, and she seemed fine besides being shook up.  They quizzed her about current events to make sure she was coherent.  She even got the year right.  How many of us would?

So there I was, barefoot, hair sticking all directions, trying to look like a competent adult who could take care of her after they left (because she was adamant about not going back to the hospital).  Her aide showed up a little bit later looking very flustered (minus the pufferfish hair) and talked 30 mph about her car, her husband, errands, etc.  I promised everyone that I would get Totoro fed, call her son, call her friend, and keep an eye on things until her aide could return again.

Boy, did I fool them.  Thank goodness she didn't require much of her breakfast to be cooked.  :)  I managed to get her soft-boiled egg cooked to edible standards, so that's something.  And mostly didn't burn anything in the toaster.  Who uses a toaster anymore??  She was very good about telling me what went where and which dishes and utensils to use.  I took a pic of her eating and texted it to her son.  Hehe, she's still vain enough that we took a few before she approved of the one I could send.  I went back through her old texts, and we looked at pics her family had sent over Xmas.  I got her laughing about the antics of her great-grandchild.

After she had finished eating and all calls were returned, I walked her into the den and settled her in under her blankies.  It was very cold yesterday (high 60s, low 70s).  I left her with two phones nearby, the tissue box, her water, and the TV remote.  Pretty sure she was asleep before I made it home.

I know the paramedics, her son, her aide, and her friend would have preferred for me to stay.  But she values her independence and doesn't like people fussing over her ALL the time. Therefore, I listened to her preferences and no one else's.  People tend to treat old people like small children.  Mofos, that woman has been through more shit than we can imagine.  I'm pretty sure she's earned the right to do wtf she wants, when she wants.

I called to check on her a couple hours later.  She was ready for lunch by then, and her aide still hadn't returned from her errands.  I went back over and helped her to the fridge, after first offering to have her sit at the table and bring her food.  Hehe, why does everyone love standing at the fridge doors peering in?  She settled on some leftover Chinese food but insisted that it be heated up.  And looked at me oddly when I said I would have eaten it cold.  This from a woman who eats raw bacon.  Just saying.  :)

Her aide showed up mid-meal, and I caught her up with everything she had eaten, meds taken, etc.  I left Totoro with another full belly, settled in her other comfy chair, with her blankies tucked under her chin.

I may go over later today with some chocolate so we can gossip about the cute paramedics...

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