magnesium and rum

Apparently my brain decided to pull some shenanigans on me and amp up my anxiety yesterday.  I had a lovely morning, hanging out with friends.

In the afternoon, once I was home, my skin started crawling with anxiety.  I couldn't figure out why or how to deflect it.  So I took my own advice and took more magnesium.  Then I took a sip of medicinal rum.  About once an hour until the migraine finally hit and swept the anxiety into a maelstrom of pain and existential crisis.

Why am I here?  What good am I doing?  Who even cares?  Why bother?  Ad infinitum.

The migraine meds didn't make a dent in the fucking pain.  I laid awake in a fugue, listening to The Dresden Files on an audio-book, trying to distract myself from how pathetic I was.

When I woke up this morning, the pain and anxiety were both gone and so was all of my energy. 

Today has definitely been a self-care kind of day.  And I even scheduled a new masseuse for later this week.  Go me!