Crazy cat ladies

My cat keeps losing her collar when she's out gallivanting during her morning outdoor time. She's gone through more than I can count now.   Because cats apparently have a knack for getting into trouble, they're called safety collars and will break away under duress so the cats don't hang themselves.  I originally bought her a collar with a bell on it to warn the birds which she kept catching and eating. That lasted exactly one day until she figured out how to work with the bell and still catch them.

Then one day, I was talking to a neighbor of mine asking if my cat was a nuisance. Rumor had it that someone's cat had been. I had no idea what I would have done if the lady said yes, since I can't really control in which yards my cat hunts and keeping her strictly indoors is out of the question. Anyway, she asked which cat was mine and then said she thought she was a stray and had just fed her that morning. Little beggar. So now I try to keep collars on her to let people know she's well-loved, taken care of, and not a stray.

Anyway, I rarely shop at Albertson's anymore, so when I do go, I stock up on collars. The cashier who rang me up asked how many cats I had after he rang up 6 collars. I told him just one, but I was 87% sure he didn't believe me. And since I don't like their organic food (or lack thereof), I didn't buy much. Of course when he gave me that look, that old game came to mind.  What 3 things could you ring through the checkout that would raise an eyebrow?  I bought 6 cat collars, hair conditioner, and tortillas, and I wasn't even trying to look crazy.